Blah blah blah

I have nothing constructive or uplifting to say today. So I’m just going to vomit thoughts for a few minutes to get it out.



Low gears

Not tired


Wanting to be touched tenderly, brought to orgasm, in a maddening frenzy, by loving eyes

Who does not respond to loves sweet intoxication?

When love fills my heart the whole world is a beautiful place to be.

Feeling emotionally depleted

Sex does not equal love

I wish it did

I could have had my fill this week.

Earth is crying

I was brainstorming last night.

Why did some mysterious chief make himself shown to me? It was intriguing. Honestly I do love mysteries, but I’m also lazy. In life I don’t like chasing after things I don’t understand. I prefer to let time reveal the truth. But this seemed like something I was meant to know. It just keeps presenting itself to me.

First the Indian and the single feather. When I asked his name I clearly heard something like Winawee or Winamee. So I couldn’t help but wonder. Is this real? Is there something I’m meant to learn here? Something I’m meant to do, to see, to share, to be. Is this specifically meant for me for some reason?

Of course I googled it. I came upon a Chief Winameg from Ohio. My heart skipped a bit when I saw he had a single feather in his headpiece. I knew he was the one, but I still didn’t understand why or what I was meant to know.

The legend says he was 100 years old when he met with the first European settlers to the area. This little boy and the chief became fast friends. They are both buried beneath an old oak tree. The tree died a few years back. The whole area of Winameg has many ancient Indian burial grounds some dated as far back at 8-15k years ago.

The vision came to me that the tree was purposely killed. That the spirit of the land is weeping for the world and its present condition. That the sacred area is very turmoiled. Maybe the fact that the only other article I found about the area claimed some hauntings were reported there helped solidify the feelings for me. That’s all I have to go by sometimes.

Honestly…..not sure what else to do here. I’ve got no business in Ohio. Seems silly to keep following this. But I did promise the chief that I would help any way he let me know I was needed. So I guess this isn’t up to me anymore. I’m just following the leads here. Bizarre as they may seem.

How can you?

How can you feel good all the time? A deep down feel good. The kind that doesn’t run out at the end of the day or after a bad run in? How?

You believe. Deep in your soul that everything that came into it was for a reason. That who you are now is who was meant to be. But. That doesn’t mean you can’t be your best you here and now. It just means you have to do the work of believing it TOO.

God already believes in you. God is already on your side. There is no answer as to why some have it better than others. There are false creations on this Earth we like to separate ourselves by.

But when it comes down to it. We were all a part of heaven at one time. Before we began. We are just on a quest of remembrance. Remember your glory. Remembering the spirit. Remembering our very soul nature. Again. A remembrance of our connectivity to everything and everyone. Now wait until we have to share that with aliens. You guys are going to freak out. ๐Ÿ˜›๐Ÿ˜›๐Ÿ˜›

Meat is meat

So ranchers across the nation are trying to persuade lawmakers to make it illegal to use the label “meat” on any plant based and lab created food that is not directly animal based.

The first I find mildly funny but the latter I find completely understandable. I absolutely do not want to eat lab created meat sold simply as meat. Reminds me of that mystery stuff they put in sloppy joes and tacos in school lunches. Is it meat? Back then at least it wasn’t lab created. Soy enhanced maybe like Jack in the Box tacos.

Reminds me of sex with a dildo. It’s not meat. Or rather it isn’t real cock. Prosthetics have progressed pretty far but I’m not sure there is enough of a need to have fake penis’ that can be connected to nerves so a person can have the sensation of the real thing. God knows I would love to feel that.. but…..

I know from personal experience that the real thing and the fake ones are very different. There is zero comparison for me, but that doesn’t mean the fake cock isn’t worthy of favor. I don’t have to express it’s many, many wonderful uses to any of you I’m sure. Lol

But you can’t go around calling it a real cock. Now can you?

eBay *rant*

I won’t go as far as to say I hate it. I’ve been buying and selling on there since my 16 year old was born. I’ve made some decent money with it. But…….

It’s JUST STUFF and these avid collectors take it all way to fucking serious.

Right now I’m selling some Native American artifacts and vintage Wild West Americana for a client. Nice guy. He’s sick. Can’t work. So he is liquidating his entire collection and gave me a dozen items to start with….to test me out. I get it. Completely. I do a lot of hand holding and anxiety easing. This has been the case in most jobs I’ve held so it doesn’t surprise or bother me one bit. I find it funny that people look to me for something I was never given much of in life and I still manage to do it well.

I get that it’s not easy for anyone to give a stranger their possessions and trust they will do what they claim to do. I get that no matter how trustworthy I seem this is not an easy ask. But when people I don’t know and have never seen or met start harassing me online claiming I’m a fraud and that I am a thief I sometimes get irritated. Yesterday I told one potential buyer who accused me of not knowing what I’m selling “whoever told you your opinion matters lied to you”.

It was all I could do. If I could reach through the computer, tie him up and whip him until he cried and sobbed deep heartfel apologies I most definitely would have.

I do my best. I take what my client tells me. I do my own research and when needed I pay online authenticators to assist me and I go with that. I’ve sold everything from cars to industrial machinery to high end art and instruments. Almost anything you can think of honestly. I even sold someone’s wedding dress they never used. These things mean nothing to me. They hold zero sentimental value. I list them accurately because it’s the right thing to do, I don’t want returns and I value my 100% feedback rating.

I am grateful I have a secondary stream of revenue, but it’s one I will be VERY happy to put away one day….hopefully.

Because at the end of the day they are STILL just things and frankly j just can’t be bothered to really care.


Here is his latest message. Mind you. I do not know this person. How I have not lost my faith in humanity astounds even me sometimes. ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿฝโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿคจ


Just finished watching the documentary called Heal on Netflix. OMG. Amazing! The first 3/4 are so uplifting and then the last 1/4 is a bit dark but still good. I expected and wanted it to keep spiraling up and it kind of just plateaued a bit but still worth a watch.

I’ll condense all I learned here; if you’re interested.

Give your life (your healing) a plan, a template, design it and surrender it to it.

Don’t let any thought cross your mind that you don’t want to experience.

Start mentally fixing the physical issue.

1) change diet
2) take control of health
3) follow your intuition
4) use herbs and supplements
5) release suppressed emotions
6) increase positive emotions
7) embrace social support
8) deepen spiritual connection
9) have a strong reason to live

The problems and stressors and trauma are portals. It’s showing you were you need to heal. What you need to look at. What needs to be gone through (dealt with) to get to a place of healing and wellbeing.

Sacred anger work and sound healing are great modalities. Theoretically anything you believe will work will work. Placebos can work up to 75% of the time.

“I don’t want to be a burden” is what they call a cancer personality.

Limiting and self conscious beliefs of fear/resistance makes you closed off to possibilities.

Create space for our own awareness

Stages of illness:
Accumulation (dosha: quality of energy)
Spread (the energy moves)
Localization finds home where we lost integrity (weakness in body) & manifests as disease
Diversifies alters tissue

Emotional blockages healed release physical blockages

Whatever you need to do to release trauma

We are so good at denying our emotions

Emotional freedom: allow them to come up

Gratitude compassion love forgiveness, heal, repair

Jagged waves of anger, fear , jealousy. We are acidic when we are in a state of stress and that is when inflammation occurs.

Some people are afraid to be well; physically, mentally, emotionally. They’ve never been well so they don’t have an idea what that will look like. They only know distress, anger, fear, illness, whatever…and the unknown (even though it is better) scares them.


Soooo I have two clear thoughts. Something I’ve been ruminating with lately. As lots of you know I love chocolate and french fries. They don’t necessarily love or hate me. But I’m going to change that. This is my new stance.

Eat crap or eat healthy but pray over the food you are so fortunate to have and theoretically that will change the energy of the food eaten:

“may this food/drink provide my body with the nutrients, energy and lifesource I need, Thank you God for providing for me. AMEN”

I also think I want to form a group of people that want to get together IRL to transform our lives using prayer, meditation, life affirming choices. Changing our lives and improving it, using our intuition and taking control over our own destinies. Lofty. Not sure how to make that palatable, but maybe that’s the whole point. Maybe I need to focus on resonating with people at the level I am at or trying to reach. Not everyone will get me or my aspirations but I just need to find my tribe.

Hope you all have found your tribe!