A twisted little smile comes across my face when I think of all the things that have been my pleasure to enjoy sexually. And while the bucket list still has a lot of boxes unchecked, I’m not worried about it.
It’s really fun to think back on my varied escapades. Only my own lapse of memory can take them from me and this blog is a nice set of cliff notes to most of it the last few years.
Am I proud to be so sexual and adventurous? Can’t say that I am. But conversely I am absolutely not ashamed either. I embrace my sexuality as a need in this human life experience. One I hope to keep partaking of for the rest of it.
But…… for now I think I’m going to take a brief pause. Brief. To focus on other things: work, my spiritual practice and possibly starting up as a pro Domme (which will not involve sex).
Of these I’m most excited and scared about the spiritual endeavors. I have to really practice and work at this. I can’t keep letting these latent abilities reek havoc on me. I have to take control.
While I’ve been going through the motions quite convincingly lately I know I have not been giving it enough attention. And that stops now.
Then there is the pro Domme thing. Again! I don’t know. I am conflicted about it. One of the owners of Privata did tell me I could use them as a location to bring my clients to. That’s a thought. Cost about as much as a hotel but safer, for me. But from the research I did men seeking this service are submissive…..so the chances of harm are extremely low.
I mean I’ve played at this for years now and knowing both sides helps me understand the dynamic and needs of a submissive. Plus my ability to sense people’s emotions has always played a part of my sex life, and helps my Dominance greatly. And it would be great to make money at something I am good at and enjoy so very, very much.
But let’s see what the future holds. I can’t say I’ll actually do it. I have a lot of work to get done right now. I’m in the middle of two difficult situations with the loan mod and the autopsy.
And while I enjoy working on multiple projects at any one time and can multitask pretty easily, right now is the time to hunker down and get stuff done.
The gym opens up tomorrow to where I won’t need a reservation anymore and can go at my leisure. So that’s a plus. I only managed to get to the gym 3 days this month. But I went on a few hikes and had those sex fueled weekends with Brad. So exercise has been had.
I have a Groupon sourced boudoir shoot scheduled for next month. Super excited. And that will get me in the gym more consistently too.
And maybe after the photo shoot and some of the difficulties have been resolved and this heavy grief passes a bit I’ll try out Tinder. I mean why not? Right? But I’m in no rush.