Flirting requires subtlety. I believe I already know how to be seductive in a general sense. And I can be flirtatious one on one when the desire has already been established as mutual. But I just don’t have any clue how to flirt with strangers in a neutral environment. The one time I saw a guy at a bar I was very attracted to I had the bartender replenish his drink on me.
In general, in life, if I really want something or someone I make my intentions clear and go for it. Subtlety really just isn’t my strong suit. And a bar is a different atmosphere than the grocery store or the line at the post office. My dating radar isn’t on alert there. I don’t go out into the world with the intention to meet single men.
Since my divorce I’ve tried dating apps, Fetlife, speed dating and other events and while I did meet a couple men this way only the apps and FetLife led to an actual relationship forming.
I mean is it even possible to meet people organically anymore?
Before marriage all my relationships were formed organically.
I’m going through all this effort and work thinking that online is the best way to meet single men and be able to vet them so as not to have to go on endless dates. But this method doesn’t give any foresight in regards to real chemistry until we meet in real life. It just ensures the logistics and necessary boxes get check marked. But is that better or worse?
I think when people meet organically and feel the pull of chemistry they are more apt to make allowances for all those other “requirements”.
I’ve been thinking of this a lot since yesterday when I said that “if you want to catch fish it helps to use bait.”. But does it? I mean, if something is meant to be it’s meant to be…. no? Fate can’t take what’s meant for you to have. It’s that whole destiny vs statistical probabilities thing that confounds me.
But since I don’t have an answer for that I guess I’ll just plugging along. Lol
Enjoy your day 💋