Anytime I have a really heavy and low emotional time, I need at least a day or two to recover. For that hangover period it’s best to leave me be; my nerves will be raw, my mood will be low and my mind will not be in a positive frame. It takes me a minute to reset, is all.
This is all part of the getting to know myself, accepting myself for who I am and learning to navigate my own terrain. It’s like when the kids aggravate me so much I feel the need to yell. It rarely happens because they know when I’m upset and know I’m “yelling” when I simply change my tone. So on the very off chance I find myself truly yelling, they all know it’s gone too far.
For one, it actually gives me a headache. Not sure if it’s because I’m that upset or it’s the yelling itself. But once I get to that point you’re guaranteed about an hour of me being really grumpy, until I can reset.
Today I feel almost myself, but yesterday I was a walking pile of mush. I don’t remember doing one useful thing. I can’t actually recall much of yesterday. I was physically present, and yet I was not there at all. Don’t ask me where I was though. Hiding in an emotional cave deep inside myself, buried under pillows, crying and licking my wounds? Something like that, I suppose.
But today is a new day. I’m not really a wallower. I don’t see any benefit to it; much like worry or fear. These things have never brought me anything good. So, when possible, I prefer not to indulge in them. Better to try to be fully present for whatever comes up in life, as it comes up.
I’ve reset. So let’s do this.π
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