Whoever it is that looks back on my blog entries and reminds me of things I’ve said that can help me in my current days journey; I want to say thank you to you.
I sometimes forget the things I say. I forget the fun times I’ve had. I forget how liberating life can be, if I let myself just enjoy it and be fully present to it all.
It’s like having my very own blog angel. It means a lot to me, whoever you are, even if you aren’t doing it purposefully. (
There are real angels, of course. But I think we forget how we can all do little things in this life for each other that can be so very, deeply meaningful and impacting.
I try not to take anything for granted. I appreciate so much the people in my life who have helped and saved me in so many ways, from strangers and neighbors, to friends and past lovers.
I am sometimes so amazed. I feel so overwhelmingly blessed. And while my life has its many difficulties, I know I’m not alone and I want to thank each and every one of you that reads my blog.
It brightens my day to see the stats go up. It intrigues me to see the blogs that people enjoy re-reading (mostly my XXX stuff but still). It’s an enjoyable part of my day; this blog and these interactions with you all.
So thank you❣️
Truly
🥰🤗🙏🏽💋
Reading your blog is… interesting; you’ve got a lot on your mind at any given moment and I find it really interesting to see how your thoughts go from one thing to the next and, often, in the same blog and, of course, being able to comment and have a dialog with you on stuff.
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Thanks! I know. I’m all over the place.
I guess I’m more of a grand idea person. I like big concepts. I enjoy the hard questions in life. Everything intrigues me. I think I lack focus or get bored easily, or both. And sometimes once I’ve accomplished or understood something I want to move on to something else rapidly.
Which is funny because conversely I’m one of the most patient people I know. At the buddhist retreat I had no problem meditating 3-4 times a day, living in almost complete silence and eating my meals slowly, quietly, calmly and even facing a blank wall.
If I need to be calm. I can be. But put a lot of stimulating ideas in front of me and I bounce around like Tiger (in Winner the Poo) or the Tasmanian devil.
I have so much on my mind right now because I have no tether too. The only thing keeping me grounded right now are my kids and this house. But with so many uncertainties right now, so much chaos, so much going on in the world. I feel like I could grasp at a string and be blown in any direction. If that makes any sense. Lol
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It makes sense – you’re not really grounded. It’s one thing to be and stay busy with stuff that has to be done… but those things don’t a,ways ground a person as much as needed, which now begs the question of what would successfully ground you and keep you there?
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No idea. Honestly none. The meditation and prayer helps keep me sane.
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Sane is good! We often tend to ground ourselves in whatever passes for reality for us and sometimes we ground ourselves looking for, well, the truth behind the reality – this is what they tell us, but thus is what I see going on – then letting the truth as you understand it firmly ground you. Many of us need someone to both ground us and keep us grounded and rooted in reality so we can stay focused on that which we must do – working, parenting, etc. – and, most of all, taking care of ourselves mind, body, and soul.
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Someone….. yea. That would be nice
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I’m guessing that you can guess my next question…
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Why don’t I find someone?
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Uh-huh. I know – too busy, not really interested, too much hassle and drama… am I close?
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It’s uncanny. Like you can read my mind. 💋
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It’s not mind reading – it’s the usual reasons why women who know they need someone ain’t looking for someone… and by someone I mean that guy who’s really going to be invested in the woman you are and want to be. Lovers are a dime a dozen and can be gotten any old time but things are so hectic that you gotta think about whether it’s really worth the effort just to take care of this need.
Not being grounded does that to everyone; not having someone who’s gonna be willing to stand by your side and face the world with you. Settling for the devil you know… because you ain’t got time to really learn a new one. Or so you believe. You got shit to take care of… but you’re doing it by yourself and with little or no moral support, let alone any other kind of support. You’re gonna say that your problems are your problems to solve and you can’t afford the distractions – and even if you don’t say that, I know plenty of women who’ve said it.
You know you could… but can’t seem to convince yourself that you need to do it; no time and all that other stuff. As a guy, I see women doing this… and shake my head and more so when they appear to be… ungrounded and kinda all over the place. Not even that really close friend who’ll sit you down and say, “Hey… chill! Breathe so you can get your shit together and stop chasing your tail!”
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Lol.
I’m enjoying my all over the place though. I’m lonely sure. But I’m ok.
I feel like I have things to sort out still. Things about who I am and where my future lies and if I had someone close to me they would inevitably influence that somewhat and I don’t want that right now.
Untethered yes. Irrational maybe. But not unhinged. Still responsible. Still doing the things I need to do.
Look. If the guy appeared out of thin air as was everything I ever thought I wanted or needed I would not hesitate. But you’re right. I don’t have the energy, time or will to put in any effort to go looking for him (or her). Lll
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Hmm…
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