I am

Lonely

Alone

Sad

Tired

Relationships aren’t the end all be all

They aren’t the happily ever after

They are whatever they are

All different

All unique

All their own thing

Being in one doesn’t make everything else perfect

Or even better; necessarily

It doesn’t

I know this

But I know how financially it does usually provide some ease

And I know how even just the complacency of habits that you create within a relationship provide some stability and familiarity

Which in their own way, even when toxic, can be comforting.

And I know I’m fine single

Capable

Smart

Just fine

But I catch myself feeling like the Loren Allred song “Never enough”.

And I hate it

Because I want to be this big ass tough bitch that can do whatever I need to do to survive and thrive in this world

And yet….

I’m just a woman

Wanting love

Sometimes

And the comfort of my own person.

Pathetic, naive, juvenile, idiotic

I’m sure many more words too

Can be said here

But I have to accept that sometimes

This is how I feel

And it’s ok to feel this way.

It’s all ok.

💋

Author: porngirl3

I have always enjoyed reading and writing. Maybe because I have always been on the quiet and reclusive side; which most people may not guess at first glance or if seeing me in a social setting, especially around people I am comfortable with but it’s also not something I have an issue with. I need solitude to recharge. Writing gives me the peace and time to renew myself...here that is offered to you for your enjoyment and pleasure as well. I hope. Lol

2 thoughts on “I am”

  1. as i read this i was feeling for you as i have felt this way many times. The only difference is i am a man and should be the strong one with the glue holding things in place. But its not my inside space. i just want to be loved for who i am.
    Hang in there for you and myself better days are in front

    Liked by 1 person

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