I’m not a humble person

I’m not considering it a fault though. That’s just me. This is not to say I don’t react “appropriately” when complimented. I thank the person and sometimes blush. I even admit when I’m given too much credit for something. Maybe it’s that I don’t put all that much stock in accolades. As much as I don’t usually take it to heart when I’m insulted or belittled either.

I recognize that A) that’s someone’s perception. It isn’t necessarily reality and I only have to give it credence if I myself actually agree with it and find merit to what they are saying. B) Superiority complexes come in all shapes, colors, sizes and varieties. I’m not going to indulge people’s idiotic need to separate people into categories, by which they can then be judged. All in an effort to make them feel better about themselves?

Those games mean absolutely nothing to me. It just feels like a waste of time and energy and thought. Mostly because we all have plusses and minuses. We all struggle and rise. We all have talents and faults and no one escapes this life without making mistakes. So I just don’t put much value into false societal constructs of merit.

Generally speaking, I find some: “experts”, academics, executives, doctors and rich people to be the worst perpetrators at this. I’m guessing that they are so used to being in power play mode in life that they tend to see others as mere dolts, plebeians, pawns and serfs to their kingdom. Their status, knowledge, experience, money, education, background, etc. give them this air of superiority that can be rather putrid.

And when I enter their orbit I tend to roll my eyes at their need to be seen as better than and treated deferentially. This doesn’t play well with some people who expect and demand that anyone under their supposed “class” play reverence to them. I am not that person and I try to avoid people who need that. It’s not that I myself feel superior in my own understanding of the reality behind this life. It’s that I know myself. I understand this journey is so much more than meets the eye. I know society has it wrong.

And while I don’t expect anyone or anything to change; I don’t want to play by these idiotic rules. Unfortunately though, this tends to mean I don’t form alliances with people that could possibly help me in life, because I’m not a “yes” person. I don’t humor people. I’m not bowing to their fawning needs. Because what I am concerned about in this life is in doing as my heart dictates, saying what needs to be said and walking away if I have to. Regardless of consequences… if that’s what it takes to nurture my soul. If that what my truth tells me.

It’s not a matter of luxury. I’ve lost many, many, many opportunities because I absolutely refused to kiss people’s asses, even if just as an initial formality. I refuse to falsely gush over people that I find no better than me, when stripped down to our deepest essence.

Conversely, this also means I don’t tend to feel sorry for people and give in to their pity parties, exaggerated expectations or anger issues because again….. they are where they are in life. But while it’s not really my fault or my problem (necessarily) if I feel compelled to help and can I will, when I have the energy, money & time. However, I will absolutely not indulge people’s need to exploit others through this systemic human delusion that perpetuates horrible lies.

And all of this to say that people don’t usually find me humble, not that I claim or pretend to be and you know what? That’s alright with me.

I know me. I like me. I’m good with it.

I know I am strong willed but kind. I’m passionate but generally calm and level headed. Maybe humble isn’t really the right word for what I’m trying to convey here exactly. It’s that I just don’t pander to people, even the hand that feeds me. I refuse to. Come what may. And I just wish everyone stood up for who they are, what they believe and how they want to be treated.

I do what I can and that’s all I can do. That’s all any of us can do. Be true to ourselves and lead by example through actions. Because our actions tell the story of who we are.

This is not to say that they will always be the right actions. And even when they are, they will not always be understood. But if we are leading with truth and honor…if we are leading with our whole hearts…if we are honoring our soul’s journey through this realm then how could it be wrong?

Goodnight

Sweet dreams. πŸ’‹πŸ€—πŸ₯°πŸ’€

Author: porngirl3

I have always enjoyed reading and writing. Maybe because I have always been on the quiet and reclusive side; which most people may not guess at first glance or if seeing me in a social setting, especially around people I am comfortable with but it’s also not something I have an issue with. I need solitude to recharge. Writing gives me the peace and time to renew myself...here that is offered to you for your enjoyment and pleasure as well. I hope. Lol

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