I’m so tired of hustling. I’ve worked since I was 15, officially, as per government records. But I started my first business back in grade school at the age of 9 selling stickers and candy in school. I’d hustle my mom for stickers from Bullock’s and buy candy with any spare change I had. Back then penny candy was still a thing. Most full size candy bars were a quarter and I could sell Jolly Rancher Sticks like they were going out of style. All with a very lofty markup. Anyone remember those? I used to love them.
I remember the first time I had a $20 bill from all my sales. I had never had that much money before, especially not my own money that I had made and could do with as I pleased. It was one of my proudest days.
But we are now talking over 30 years of working and then add house making and raising kids and I’m just fucking exhausted. I really am. Tonight, I just barely got back from picking up my mom at the airport and then stopping at the grocery store for her needs and a few things for the kiddos. It’s been a 19+ hour day and I’m so tired but also wired. I have less than 5 hours before I wake up and hustle some more.
Interestingly I got a call from a guy wanting to interview me for a sales job. I am actually really liking my new part-time job, so I’m not even sure why I’m thinking of going to this thing. Maybe because I pretty much abandoned the eBay hustle and I’m wondering if I’ll qualify for the loan modification without a 3rd income stream. Yes 3!
I saw this today and I couldn’t help but shake my head. It resonated deeply.
Brad and I argued about this. He would say “they worked for their money, they deserve it”. But CEO’s in this country make 4,000 times their own company’s lowest wage earners. 50% of Walmart part-time employees have to use food stamps to get by because of food scarcity which then the tax payers have to fund. Full-time work at some companies isn’t even offered so they don’t have to pay for insurance, overtime, or even take into account giving decent living wages.
These corporations straight up don’t give a fuck. And I’m expected to believe that their rich owners care about paying their fair share of taxes. And the only philanthropy most of them care about involves pushing their own stupid ass agendas and even then mostly just for the tax breaks. Our own president can’t even cough up his own tax records. Because that will be no surprise to anyone really. Will it? Part of me thinks he’s just waiting to fall into his biggest pickle yet and then he’s going to be like “here they are, I was going to produce them all along, now let’s all focus on that”. But he seems to escape any kerfuffle he encounters. This impeachment thing is not going to be any different I’m sure. I don’t even understand why they are wasting their time.
But anyway… I’ll have to think about that 3rd job thing. Part of me thinks this is ridiculous, no one should have to work this hard just to have a roof over their children’s head and food on the table. I’m not out trying to buy a Maserati or my own private island. I’m just trying to survive.
We’ll see. I guess it doesn’t hurt to go investigate the situation and see if it’s a good fit for some extra income. But jeezus I really just can’t spread myself any thinner right now. I’m feeling a bit like giving up on it all. But I sacrificed so much to open this business that I love and I’m really good at. How is it my fault people are too stupid, embarrassed and/or brainwashed to grasp that colonics are truly beneficial for everyone not just people with digestive issues? I’m so fucking tired of beating on that drum too. Ugghhhhhh.
You know… not only is colon cancer in the top 3 deadly cancers but now we have anal cancer on the rise. Is anyone listening? The worst part is that it isn’t even just seniors anymore, the age for these cancers is getting shockingly low, like early 30’s. With the environmental toxins, the bad food, the stressful life we all lead; is anyone even surprised?
I better try and get some sleep or at least close my eyes and rest. I can’t load up on caffeine to get by because it only makes me jittery and I’m still in training at this new job. So I gotta show up somewhat bushy tailed.
Sorry for ranting. Thanks for reading, if you’ve gotten this far. I’ll take any words of encouragement, if anyone has any. If not, I get it…I really do. We all have our own drama and issues and I don’t expect everyone to think like I do or understand my point of view.
But I feel better just having gotten it off my chest.
Sweet dreams crazy ass world.