Fight, flight, freeze and surrender
From most powerful to most submissive responses we can give in life. The most common I suppose.
I’m done vacillating between them all. I just want to stand strong and calm towards whatever comes my way. Not reverting to any of the above but staying centered within myself and letting life flow as it will.
Otherwise I think I’m going to end up very frustrated; wishing my life would be one way and dealing with the outcomes that differ from that in whichever way I can manage. When, as often happens, life doesn’t work out anything like I planned, worked and wished for. When it throws me curve balls, knocks me to the ground, sends me with my tail tucked a few too many steps back and tries to humble me greatly…to say the least.
I’m just done trying to pretend this is going to end up any different than how it has been. Difficult, but fun. Meaningful but full of heartache. Painful but full of extraordinarily beautiful and spiritual moments.
I think I’m just going to be ok with this as it stands. Sure I could wish for all kinds of great things: ease, accolades, financial windfalls, knights in shining armour, soulful friendships, help, stability, people to love, on and on. I mean Santa’s list could be a 7 page single spaced list if I sat here long enough. Lol
But instead, I think I’m just going to take things as they come. So much easier that way. And I guess there’s my ease right there. One down 6+ more pages to go. For right now, this moment, I think I’ll masturbate and drift off to sleep.
Goodnight sweet, mad, topsy turvy world. I love you!