My readership is down. Way down. Maybe it’s my lack of sex talk. Maybe it’s the turmoil in my life. Maybe it’s my “out there” and taboo subject materials. Maybe it’s my tone as of late. I can’t really say. I really don’t know. The funny thing is…..it doesn’t bother me at all.
Contrary to what quite a few people may think; I’m not doing this for attention. Nor do I expect handouts or or to be saved by someone. I’m especially not looking for pity and I usually am not looking for advice either.
This is just me desperately seeking a place I can be myself. I can share myself. I can scream about my experiences. Cry and laugh about the absurdity and pain and wonder of it all. Reminisce and slather myself in the experience that is me on this planet. After all, it’s the only experience I’ve got. I want to express my deepest feelings. I want to let it all out. Show all of me.
While I didn’t expect to be understood; I have found that so often here on this platform from kind kindred souls. While I didn’t expect to be accepted I have been welcomed into people’s hearts thousands of miles away and I cant express the gratitude and humility that gives me deep inside. And if there is one of you reading this or 100 makes no matter.
I am speaking my truth. At least here in this little speck of the etherworld I can do that freely and honestly (mostly at least). I wish I could write with 100% truth but we don’t live in that kind of world and between being held libel and having it have negative repercussions on my kiddo’s I do have to censor myself somewhat here.
But all the same. I’m more free here than I am anywhere else really, except the comfort of my home. But I don’t talk all that much, which is fine….. plus there aren’t other adults around. And as you all know some of my thoughts are very not PG.
Although I’ve been feeling a bit asexual lately. It’s fine. I’m enjoying this. Usually when I’m not having sex I’m feeling like a dieter at a buffet. Man candy everywhere I can’t have for whatever reason. Lol
Anyway……I guess this is a small thank you to whoever is out there in the quiet of the universe reading this now, friend I know….. or not yet. Thank you for being a witness and allowing me the space to be me.💋🥰🙏🏽❣️