I’ve decided to just end this. I will lose the equivalent of $140k in time, energy and money that I invested in this house and business.
I should have just gotten that mommy makeover I wanted in the first place. Probably better use. At least maybe I could have become a stripper or something; some other notable single mom job. Maybe I could have caught myself a beau.
Oh well. No use lamenting bad decisions I’ve made. I’d like to say I’m in the clear and going forward all decisions will be stellar but I can’t say that with any certainty at all.
So it looks like we have about 180 days to figure things out; maybe more.
I’m just gonna opt to see the good side of things; a new adventure, new faces, new things to explore, new opportunities.
I learned a lot here. I healed. I learned about myself. I grew in ways I didn’t even know I needed to. It’s bittersweet. I really liked it here. But I’m not gonna cry. I’m overdue. I haven’t cried in a while, but now is not the time.
Part of me feels this huge weight has lifted. I don’t have to keep spinning anymore; trying so hard to keep everything afloat. I can breath. I can let it all go. Everything I was holding on so tightly too. Every dream I had of living here happily, of stability, of a future for my children and myself. All dead.
Oh well. No use right now worrying about it. It’s over and done with. Can’t reverse time. Can’t undue choices from the past. If I could I would start much farther back than just 3 years ago anyway. No use. No use at all.
Bye Oregon. 🚪 I don’t anticipate ever coming back. I don’t think I ever will want to…far too painful of a memory. Cest la vie. 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️