I really try to love my body in any and all sizes it’s been. I enjoy when I’m leaner and less pudgy feeling but at the same time the lifestyle of pudge and eating out is kind of fun too.
I think I’m very body positive with my girls. I talk to them about realistic body sizes and how unique and beautiful (aka perfect) they are in their own way. I walk around naked or with just a bathrobe on no problem. Mostly not naked though truthfully but just no issues around it either way. With the exception that I sleep naked.
Now for one I think it is actually healthy for you but also I got into the habit when 6 months pregnant in CA heat in the dead of summer. It’s the kind of hot that wants to choke you to death. No A/C. No swamp cooler. No window A/C unit. A few fans. 🙄🙄🙄
Since then I’ve not been able to dress for sleep. Wierd I know. Probably…… but it wouldn’t be so bad if the girls didn’t sleep with me. We don’t share blankets. I don’t remember what sleeping method that is but it definitely does work wonders for not getting your sleep interrupted by whoever you’re sleeping with. Especially when you’re a light sleeper like me. So anyway there is no touching. I get it though. That’s a strange thing by most people’s standards. Hey. I wish they’d sleep in their own beds too. It’s fun and cute but trust me I prefer to sleep alone or with a partner only. Ugghhhhhhh.
Being naked is one of the most natural things to be. We are animals. So when we can’t not be dressed I think is when it is much worse psychologically. To me it would seem at least. I love my body. It does everything I need. Maybe not as perfectly as it used to when I was 16 or as quickly but that’s not my goal in life right now. Who knows maybe those things will one day align. Worse things could happen. 🤣🤣🤣
But I was thinking what could I wear? I can’t even wear underwear during my period; which yes I agree kind of gross, but I can’t. I even went and bought period sheets. They have red kisses all over them so it all blends in a bit. Even sex during your period would be ok on them. Just add to the dimensions of it. Lol
Nordstrom’s maybe has some super soft almost see through thin real cotton short jumpers. That’s the only thing I think may work for me and I do favor cotton. I used to be a stickler but then leggings came into style and I had to turn my back on most cotton. 😭😭😭 But to sleep I do need the breathability and softness of cotton or some very high quality synthetic I suppose. Which again I can probably find at Nordstrom’s but can I justify the expenditure? No!! I absolutely can’t. I still sweat completely through the sheets some nights but I also can’t sleep without covers. It could be burning hot and I can’t sleep without a blanket or sheet on at the very least. These are the stupid thoughts that keep me up at night. The OMG I am doing all I can to be a good mother here. I really hope I’m doing alright. I couldn’t ask for better daughters. I love them so much.
I’m so sick of being poor. Being poor sucks monkey balls and asses and then vomits and eats that back up again. Pretty much. 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️. Sorry. Had to say it.