My life feels like a roller coaster sometimes, and while I don’t necessarily dislike that to some extent I really wish it would stabilize a tiny bit more, or as Lisa said yesterday, the hope is that as I raise my vibration the whole platform I’m on raises and at least I’ll get better views. Lol
She did an energy healing on me. Her interpretation of it: my aura had damage at the first and second chakras and I took on baggage that was not mine. She said she healed it.
My interpretation of it: deep relaxation to the point I caught myself snoring. But I was completely conscious, which was just so weird. I’m not a napper and I wasn’t that tired when I walked in. Then as she moved around my body I was able to clearly sense areas that were in pain and wanted attention and healing. Up until that very moment I had never noticed before that my right rotator cuff was sore.
(But I walked out of there more porous than when I walked in. When I immediately went to work on my client right after, who gets very nauseous during colonics, I became almost violently nauseous myself. It lasted for hours too. I really need to get that under control. This picking up on others people’s issues is not fun at all.)
I really like Lisa and I really do think her heart is in the right place and she has real talent with energy work. She gives the most awkward half-ass hugs though which I try not to take personal. Her apartment is really cute and modern but I had to use the restroom and someone had forgotten to flush (more than mellow). This of course doesn’t bother me in the least, but I wonder how other people may feel about it. She’s a single mom so I get her plight in life and I truly hope she succeeds.
With most energy workers I don’t feel the energy. Not to say something isn’t happening but if I can’t feel it (being that I’m so sensitive to it) and I don’t see any positive outcome then I assume there is a disconnect between the modality or practitioner and myself. With Lisa I’ve very clearly felt the energy two out of three times. I especially like the work she does with the tuning forks and will probably see her for that again at some point.
But for now I’ve got to cut back on the expenses. I think it’s absolutely vital for healers especially to get healing and realignment and she had reached out to me for a free session, which I paid her for all the same. I definitely want to include her in the group of healers I would like to form, but all this is on the back burner for now.
Sometime this month I find out if I am getting the loan modification approved. If it isn’t approved I will have to (hopefully, if they let me) sell my house. Then we will have to move. Since I’ll be having to take the teenager away from her friends and out of her school anyway then it really doesn’t matter where in the world we move to. I can’t see moving back to California as being a great fit though, even though one of my old bosses would probably give me work if they have it, but housing is ridiculous and I refuse to move them to the ghetto.
I don’t have any family or friends that can really help me in a short term (a few months) situation with all three girls so I can get settled somewhere and on my feet.
But I’m not going to worry. I’m not going to stress. I’m just going to sit in this holding pattern until I figure out what my next move needs to be based on whatever choices given me. Until then I’m just going to keep doing what I’m doing.
Tomorrow I need to mow the lawn and pull the weeds. I had wanted to take the girls to the river but it’s been raining. I’ve got to figure out somewhere to take them for not a lot of money that they will have fun doing. I’ve kept them home all summer so far and their devices are starting to meld onto their bodies. When I’m busy or working that’s all they seem to do and I can’t enforce no device time if I’m not here so why make them lie and feel bad about it.
Last night I started to cry and then I stopped myself. I didn’t want to succumb to it. I didn’t squelch it as much as just table it for another time and place. Not now. Right now I just want to stay positive and focused and strong.
Que Sera Sera.
Wishing you some positive energy. 💋💋💋