Men are so funny. They think because they sometimes or even mostly do as they are told they can be considered submissive. I find it erroneous and delusional on their part to assume submission is simply following orders especially when it’s generally only the requests they wish to follow.
What most men that think they are submissive really want is some fantasy scenario where the women dominates over them in the fashion that they seek. In other words they want to top from the bottom. They want to choose what they do and how they do it but they want it to look, on paper, like they are the ones humbling themselves to a dominant power.
It makes me laugh. As both a dominant and a submissive and having had my power stripped from me completely in the past I understand true servitude very well.
True submission is not having any predisposition about it at all to begin with. It is following what you are told to do because you are told and doing it with the happy intention to please your dominant because that is your role. To me true submission to its finest is knowing your dominant so well that when you can anticipate their desires you do so without needing direction and when you can’t and haven’t been directed you clarify or wait for clarification; whichever the situation dictates.
You do this because you know your dominant will in turn take care of you in the ways you need. Providing the connection, intimacy, and fulfilment you seek deep inside. You know your dominant will anchor you in life and tether you to them so you have them always as a guide, as a shelter, as a friend, as someone you can trust implicitly in all ways because they harbor your heart and soul and treasure you more than the greatest riches of heaven and Earth.
But this must be earned through sacrifice and diligence to your dominant in the ways he/she needs. I am so tired of playing with men who don’t understand this concept. I can not give you my all if you do not show yourself worthy of it. I won’t even give you my time for the rubbish offered.
Tyler is chomping at the bit for me to be his dominant. Yet….. I’ve given him multiple chances to prove his devotion in simple ways and he refuses. He has excuses, some even half plausible….lol… as if I cared about them.
Brad says “you’re the boss” as if his docile and accommodating nature proves he is doing what I want him to do. It irritates me that men are so entrenched in their own selfishness and yet fully expect me to believe their stupid games. Fully expect me to devote myself to them. I play along because my eyes are open. They aren’t fooling me one bit. And to have to tell a man over and over what I want and need to fall on deaf ears gets old really quick.
I’m all for compromise. I’m all for negotiations. But this tits for tat scenario while ok for now is not what I truly want and need. It’s enough to keep me temporarily engaged but not enough to truly satisfy me, let alone let me give myself completely and devote myself to them. Dominance is a true, deep devotion and love to and for the one in submission as well. There becomes this invisible bond that is stronger than any man made creation could ever be.
I need this. To be truly satisfied I need this. I miss it……and all these trade-offs and all these tokens are fun and nice in their own way but they aren’t the level that I want to be playing on. I need to truly be the dominant as far as my love life goes and I’m not willing to accept less. Which is also why I will never marry Brad. I love him but it’s not enough. It’s just not enough.
I honor my needs first….. period. And when the person comes that will truly give me their entire being I will give them my all, and although it hasn’t happened yet…… I harbor the hope. Because after all…..that which you seek is seeking you. And this I truly do believe.