I’ve still got work to do (sexual healing)

Soo…….

Let’s not kid ourselves I got laid last night. Brad came to get me and we went to dinner first. He gave me money to play at the restaurant and I won a tiny bit. We both got a little tipsy and ended up with him domming me. It was about 2am after a lovely Lelo assisted orgasm when he asked me to Domme him and I was beyond exhausted. I simply rolled over and fell asleep.

But at 9am I popped up not feeling great (the three tiny ribs I had eaten and 2 glasses of cheap champagne hadn’t sat well overnight); however I wasn’t about to waste the morning. We spent the first hour with me in full control. I tied his arms and legs to the bed, gagged him and tied up the base of his cock and balls. Then I proceeded to torture and mark him. I reminded him who he belonged to. Who owns him. He was very sensitive, probably due to his hangover, but I didn’t let it stop me.

“Wait I’m going to vomit” he says at one point and I look at him with all the cruelty I can muster in my eyes and say “what do I care, I’m not cleaning it up, vomit if you have to”. The look of shock and disappointment in his face was priceless. He was just being cheeky and I don’t stand for that, plus what’s a little vomit. I’ve done it. Who cares?

He was getting pretty spent though and I was getting pretty horny so I took him out and what happened next I still haven’t quite processed completely.

(Very perverted and maybe disturbing content follows…..you’ve been warned.)

Let me preface by saying that as most of you probably know we both love role-playing. Sooooo….judge if you want to but….

We play daddy/daughter quite often but knowing I was sexually abused by my uncle for an extended period of time in my early childhood he often likes to put me in that scenario again. I don’t usually like it truthfully. It makes me very uncomfortable so I wanted to make him feel just as uncomfortable and I said “if you’re gonna play my uncle than I’m going to play your niece” and I forced him to call me by his real niece’s name.

I had no idea where this would go. Honestly I thought he would freak out a bit, back down and never try it again. He was indeed taken aback. He had a hard time with it at first but soon not only where we both getting into it but I realized I was more turned on than I had been in a very long time. The juices were flowing strong.

My body was responding on it’s own accord and it brought a reality to the situation I had never felt before. I couldn’t understand why my body was so responsive to this. But I orgasmed fully submerged in this role and then immediately balled my eyes out.

He kept the gig up trying to get me to keep crying, in a loving way though. While still fucking me. Lol. And I was brought back to being that young girl again….. so confused by what was happening. Not understanding any of it, feeling utterly helpless and scared but enjoying some of it none the less. And the tears kept coming and it was so much…..so, so much. And then he capped it off with going down on me and fingering me and the boi has improved his skills so much he had me in a complete orgasmic frenzy.

My only complaint is that I needed after care and he neglected to provide it and I could not even source the words to ask for it. Instead I laid there comatose (my body, emotions and mind still in a huge tailspin) for at least 15 minutes until I could regain some semblance of function and stumbled myself to the bathroom to pee.

I still don’t think I’ve processed it entirely. But it makes me keenly aware that something I’ve been working on for years still has such a strong effect on my subconscious mind and body. And the way the trauma resurfaced and melded into pleasure and then into release and……

And….

Well….it’s just something that while I’m glad happened makes me see this skeleton still needs to be looked at in the light of day. It still needs to be healed. I still have work ahead of me.

I guess it’s better to know these things than to bury my head in the sand. I wonder if it ever will be fully healed and I wonder what lies ahead for me in regards to how this still affects my choices and desires.

I never asked for this issue in my life and yet here we are. Such is life….isn’t it?

Wishing you an orgasmic day without any resurfaced trauma. 💖💋🤪

Author: porngirl3

I have always enjoyed reading and writing. Maybe because I have always been on the quiet and reclusive side; which most people may not guess at first glance or if seeing me in a social setting, especially around people I am comfortable with but it’s also not something I have an issue with. I need solitude to recharge. Writing gives me the peace and time to renew myself...here that is offered to you for your enjoyment and pleasure as well. I hope. Lol

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