The last strap on I ordered didn’t work. It had a hole in the shaft for a penis. It was not for a vagina. So I ordered this one and it came today and……
I literally….LITERALLY….had 6 men message me last night wanting to know what I was up to. 3 came right out and suggested sex, two wanted cuddles and one I could have directed to my liking.
But I went to sleep early and woke up late and expect to do the same tonight, even though the madness has already started. 3 inquiries already today.
I’m flattered. Truly. I mean….. why wouldn’t I be? I don’t take it for granted….. but there is only one of me and I’m not a fucking slut…regardless of what anyone thinks and I simply don’t have the mental, emotional, physical stamina to even try to deal with this right now.
I don’t even know why they assume I would. That’s the most mysterious part for me. Most of these men I’ve never even met IRL. Crazy!! What ever happened to taking a girl to dinner first? Not that I want that either but still.*
Anyway…. my allergies have been kicking my ass, my emotional equilibrium has been a bit off and I’ve been moving the kids in and reorganizing my business. All I really need is a foot massage and a hot bath, maybe breakfast in bed.
God…..I would trade one great guy for the attention of five dozen men right now. But…..ugghhh. I feel like my entire life is like that Rolling Stones song “You can’t always get what you want”….especially right now.
Well… let’s see if at least this strap on is what I want. I want to orgasm while I fuck a man. Not too much to ask. Is it?
*I know though….that this isn’t solely about sex. Sex is the bonus…. I’m supposing. The real play here is feminization. For all except 1… who I haven’t exactly figured out his true desires… the game is about the play. About being free to be himself in that dynamic and appreciated that way.
I know….I guess…. from what I’ve been told… that there aren’t that many women into the feminization of men. I find that really sad, but again. I’m just ONE girl. I can’t save the world one fuck at a time. It doesn’t really work that way. I mean… I probably wouldn’t complain if it did… but it doesn’t.
& I think all that sex would leave a person feeling pretty empty inside. Personally meaningless sex is more unfulfilling than the agony of abstinence.
From what I am learning though these men would accept feminization** without having any sex at all. Maybe some would even prefer it that way. Many have offered service in exchange for play…. but that’s too much for me to wrap my head around. I haven’t played that way. I wouldn’t know where to start.
I’m hopefully having a coffee date with a beautiful young Domme next weekend that is into sadism and doesn’t fuck her subs. It’s not until I can understand these things clearly that I can see where I want to go with it. Since I have no one who’s input I need to take into consideration right now the carte blanche is just a bit overwhelming sometimes.
I don’t like to think of feminization as this but most people do sooo. Yea.