Subs: each person is different in their sub space
I’ve had one top continually from bottom wanting me to command him in the ways he desired
One would not make a single move or even speak without my decision and input
One disliked me commanding him but loved pampering me in the ways he thought most fitting but not knowing me well enough missed the mark repeatedly
I woke up just now in a bit of a fitful sleep. I had been dreaming of a sub. He was a very strong sub. So very powerful in his sub space. He had complete control of himself. Even as I wavered in my Domme space he held me strong. Like the firm hand of a gentleman. He brought out of me not what he wanted, NO…… he gave me the force to be who I wanted. I can’t explain it too clearly…. it is nuanced.
I am learning still….but as I have stated before; as has been reinforced to me time and time again. When given the opening ….when the field is cleared for me… I blossom. I rise.
I can not be pushed. I can not be pulled. I can not be molded. I am already here. My torrential love, frenzied lust, all-encompassing need to devour, to own is already within; watching, waiting, deep inside. It just needs ample space, time, devotion and now I see….the missing piece I hadn’t yet seen before….strength.
Not my strength. My strength is here, sometimes dormant, but here. I have needed to see sub strength. I understand now something I didn’t before. A clue. All part of the grand puzzle. I am dizzily mesmerized by my new realization.
Maybe as I grow stronger in my own space none of these things will matter. I can’t say. I see older Domme’s who can switch it on instantly for anyone and I am amazed. I can own the space but I am not at a point where I want to share myself this way with just anyone. I want to be completely who I am with just one very special man. One who will see and be privy to the entire depth of my being. We shall see.
💋goodnight again (4:43am)