Energy Shift

And no I don’t mean the kind that happens during sex. Lol

I went to see a life coach/energy healer. She was amazing. Simply amazing. I got concrete logical strategic advice that helped clear a few things; like how much time I spend now on my various projects vs how much I should be spending to maximize my focus and to achieve the desired outcome. Then I also got a mental and energetic shift which I very much needed.

She was able to get me to see that asking for help does not have to come from a place of meekness. It can come from a place of courage and generosity on both parts. It’s a win/win situation, not a loss/take one. It is not disempowering. It is acceptance of what is being offered along with the gratitude that that brings. It is a place of happiness for all concerned. It is also a place of being able to offer from my part that of which I am of value. I have A LOT to offer and that is the space I am needing and wanting to inhabit and before today I didn’t even know that space existed in the ramifications of asking for and accepting help.

We all have an inherent instinct to help. We really do and it’s a base need to give that love, to give that energy to someone outside of ourselves. I’ve been such a bad accepter all my life and that stops now.

Tony during the holidays was trying to give me what appeared to be a wad of about $500 in 20’s and I knew he meant it with the most sincere kindness and generosity of spirit and I declined it. He wanted so much to give it. At the time I thought it would endear each other too much. He wasn’t divorced yet.

Side note: It is so not fair to make someone go through that. Frankly; one needs to get divorced for reasons that DO NOT involve anyone besides the ones married. Secondly, it is my firm belief that people need AT LEAST a year after a marriage to figure out who the heck one is again…alone. Just oneself. Thirdly, it’s just selfish to make someone go through the drama and emotional roller coaster that is divorce and post divorce. It’s not fair to let/make someone stand beside one through that ordeal. Sucky!!! All the way around. Divorce is hell! That’s my motto. Now again. To each his own and every rule has exceptions, but that’s my take as of now.

So yes. Back to my point. An energy shift was much needed and so appreciated. My miracle hasn’t shown itself yet; but it will. I gathered a conference of angels…mine, the children’s, the pets, everyone’s that has loved me, anyones angels that I’ve loved, the angels of those that have kindness in their hearts for me and those that I have touched and well as those that have touched me…and no I don’t mean sexually. Although that isn’t a bad thought either. Lol

Anyway.

I called a conference of angels to help find the way. With a strong delegation like that there simply is not a way it won’t manifest. (Double negative)

But…

On another note

prior to that I squirted again tonight. It was slightly gritty, not as sweet smelling but not a bad smell with no taste whatsoever. It just depends what my diet is how that goes. After sushi guess what it smells a little like. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜

Anyway…

this time it happened while not even thinking of sex or anything remotely sexual. My body must be trying to tell me something…

I’m pretty sure I know what it wants. The difficulty isn’t in getting it; the difficulty is that I’m trying to abstain. Ugghhhhh. Being celibate sucks!!! My libido is so high. I need sex like 2-3 times a week to be satisfied. More is ok, less is just not; but random sex just isn’t my thing. To each his/her own. Right? So I wait and it builds and heaven forbid I be around virile men…like the gym, or just wherever. My heart starts to palpitate. Doesn’t everyone love the smell of men?

And then…

to find that one smell. That one man that really sets ones soul on fire. Oh my!! I know where this night is going. Maybe I need to break out that cordless new vibrator I haven’t even taken out of the box yet. Am I getting wet again? Shhhhhhhhh

Author: porngirl3

I have always enjoyed reading and writing. Maybe because I have always been on the quiet and reclusive side; which most people may not guess at first glance or if seeing me in a social setting, especially around people I am comfortable with but it’s also not something I have an issue with. I need solitude to recharge. Writing gives me the peace and time to renew myself...here that is offered to you for your enjoyment and pleasure as well. I hope. Lol

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